Saturday, December 27, 2008

a perfect lie

i like to think of myself as a pretty spontaneous, carefree person.  i've been called effervescent (you know who you are) many-a-times.  i prefer to not get too wrapped up in future plans, opting to live my life as it comes, taking on the small daily battles as they come.

but today, i feel tired, rundown, unsure of myself.  i wonder how long i will stay in korea, wonder if i will stay at my current job for a few years or opt to find a uni position after a couple.  or will i go to a different country?  or say goodbye to the world of teaching and go to grad school?  and if that is the case, then what will i go for?  journalism?  mba?  econ?  

god, i hate myself right now.  i hate the annoying analytical voice in my head, screaming 'plan plan plan!'  this is the time when i wish i had a bathtub in my apartment, not just an all-in-one bathroom.  

i live my life in the pursuit of happiness and fun.  

this is a bloody funk.  it will pass.

the end.

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